Wednesday, September 14, 2011

My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?

i can tell my husband how i feel about things and he hears them and he doesnt change his behavior at all...his saying is..%26quot;i am not a nice person and i don't care%26quot; ...comments? i am left feeling frustrated and depressedMy husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
If he is telling you that he doesn't care, why do you want to stay with him? If he loves you he should do his best to make you as happy as possible, but he is not even trying. Find somebody who cares about how you feel, you deserve itMy husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
if he doesn't care about the way you feel, he doesn't care about you. maybe it's time to reevaluate your marriage.My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
If he does not care about your feelings, maybe he isn't the right man for you. The right man would respect your feelings. He would be willing to work with you to save the relationship.My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
well would tell him if he does not change you are going to leave him . and maybe that will make him think.My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
If he is that type person, most likely , he is not going to change. It sounds like it's time to re-evaluate your life, and your options. He's not going to change......you either have to accept him, or move on. I don't mean that in a bad way, but I have been there and done that....they don't change!My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
Your husband is a very selfish person, he does not care about you or anyone else, didn't you know how your husband was before you married him. The thing is he is going to get worst! Do you think you are going to be able handle, this through out your life!You may want to get out, of such a marriage, because you are not going to be happy. And I think you deserve some happiness!My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
well depending on what it is, take off for the weekend by yourself, let him think and you think, come back and talk.My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
men are really difficult. i feel sorry for you. every one will probably say just leave him, but i know its not that simple. i dont know what to tell you, if leaving is not a option, grid your teeth and turn away. he'll be punished for it, it will come back to him one way or another. if you stable enough to leave(financialy, emotionaly), then do it. other wise pray that he gets better!My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
Join the club sister, my wife is the same. Either that or ask my opinion knowing full well she will not even take into consideration my feelings. You need to make a choice live with it or leave.My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
Sounds like you picked the wrong guy . See how he likes it , start treating him as if you don't care about him . If that doesn't get his attention tell him you 're leaving .My husband will hear my feelings but does not change his behavior according to how i am feeling. comments?
I understand your frustration and pain. Men and women are so very different. Men show their love in very quiet ways. A woman has to be very alert to see how they say %26quot;I love you%26quot;. They are saying they love you when they fix things for you. A woman has to watch very carefully to see when a man is caring. They do their caring in a TOTALLY different way. It is even hard for us to comprehend these differences!! They are very proud of themselves if they remember to take out the trash, put a new toilet paper roll on, carry their dishes to the sink, etc. They are a lot like little boys!!!!!! It is disheartening for women. We not only mother our children, but we must be a kind of 'mother; to our husbands. Even in the bedroom, they show their love in lovemaking. They are confounded that we don't view this the same way they do. They think...'After our wonderful lovemaking, how can you doubt that I adore you??!! Many men prefer mostly silence. They do not understand a woman's need for talking. I know that sounds strange...even weird, but it's the truth. When we are dating, we admire the 'strong silent type'...the mystery of it all. When we are married for awhile, we want a partner who is friendly, engaging. Our husbands have not changed at all, but our expectations seem to change. Many men are are brilliant when it comes to technology, but almost retarded in the emotional realm! Most women are just the opposite. Just go into Home Depot..it is like walking into the mind of a man...gadgets everywhere, nuts and bolts...things to fix things with. Yet go into JoAnnes or other feminine type stores...see the differences? We are so unlike that it is amazing we make it at all...as couples! The feminine mind is mostly 'people' oriented, the masculine mind is 'thing' oriented. Fixing things, etc. Even in small babies this is apparent. A baby girl looks at faces for approval, a baby boy checks out the mobile, or how the crib is put together. It's a riot. :-) You wonder why your guy doesn't seem to change when you explain your frustration and depression...the causes, etc. It's mainly because they don't totally get it. It is hard to put yourself in someone else's feeling world. This is especially true for most men. They listen, but really don't FEEL your pain. For them it seems if they wait long enough you will get over this mysterious' stuff' you are talking about. We are all lazy in our thought patterns and conditioned habits..it is EXTREMELY hard to change anyone, but the male/female differences even go deeper...at a gene level. Your best bet is to notice the 'little things; he does and show him your gratitude. This noticing and APPRECIATION will encourage him bit by bit to be more 'with you' when you need him. Men live for appreciation and totally die from criticism. Criticize a man and you lose him either to another woman or to a total retreat behind the newspaper, etc. Meanwhile, write out your frustrations...madly write. Talk to someone you can trust..ideally another woman. Get your feelings out, somehow. It is very difficult, no doubt. Millions of women join you in this frustation! I have hobbies like painting, crocheting, writing...Do not expect your man to fill all your empty places. If you have a man who works, is not a 'womanizer', one who is dependable...well, you have a lot. By the way, this applies to most men..there are a few

who are more sensitive , but they are often gay. :-) Good luck to you!!!! P.S. I have been married for a long time and it took years for my husband to 'come around' to understand me...and he's coming along nicely.

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